Two models of Grief
The 5-stages of Grief
- Kübler-Ross model (1969)
The 7-stages of Grief
- Wright model (2011)
The Five Stages of Grief according to the Kübler-Ross Model
Initially the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross model (1969) discussed the "5 stages of grief" in regard to people with an terminal illness and how to deal with devastating news. This model became also accepted for those who faced the loss of a loved one and was dealing with grief - not facing death him/herself. A major misconception of this model is that people believe that these stages are in a linear progression (you have to go through stage 1 first before you can get to stage 2). One might also assume that each stage is similar in length and that once a stage is completed, you will not get back to that stage.
The 5 stages of grief are: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.
Denial: When an individual receives bad news, the initial thought/action would be to deny the information - the information is incorrect, they made a mistake, this is not happening to me.
Anger: When the individual can no longer deny the news, anger will set in - Why me? It is not fair!
Bargaining: A person will try to bargain for a better outcome - negotiation with God a frequently a bargaining tool used by those facing a terminal illness or the loss of a loved one.
Depression: Will set in once the realization occurs that there is no way out. One might become silent and separates him/herself from others to be alone.
Acceptance: Happens when the person knows there is no way avoiding the inevitable - one will accept his/her terminal illness or one will accept the loss of a loved one.
The Seven Stages of Grief according to the Wright Model
Wright used the Kübler-Ross "5 stages of grief" model as a basis for her "7 stages of grief" model. It seems that her development of these stages lean more towards those who faced the loss of a loved one, while the Kübler-Ross model was initially meant for those facing a terminal illness/bad news.
The 7 stages of grief are: Shock & Denial, Pain & Guilt, Anger & Bargaining, Depression, Reflection, & Loneliness, The Upward turn, and Acceptance & Hope.
Shock & Denial: When faced with the loss of a loved one, a person might deny the reality and get into shock to avoid becoming overwhelmed.
Pain & Guilt: Suffering and pain will replace the previous stage.
Anger & Bargaining: The frustration caused in the previous stage will lead to anger and bargaining. One might try to negotiate to change the loss.
Depression, Reflection, & Loniliness: A person will have a prolonged period of sadness.
The Upward Turn: Will occur when life becomes more organized without the one losed.
Reconstruction & Working Through: Focussing on a new life with solutions for another life.
Acceptance & Hope: Final stage. Reality is accepted and future opens up.